How to Surrender and allow flow to return to your life.

surrenderworkshopEvery time I check my stats I see that many of you are arriving here from typing ‘How to surrender’ into Google. So first up, I love you!

I believe that the moment we step up and ask for help, want to view things differently or even just be willing to try something new we have done half the work already.

If you like this post I now also run a 90 minute one on one Workshop and If you would like to learn with me how to put these ideas into practice in your life then perhaps you might be interested in this Surrender Session? 

PLUS: Sign up to my mailing list to be one of the first to receive news about my NEW online course ‘Surrender Forever’ coming soon!




Now let’s get to it! 

I believe that i’m co creating my experience with an energy that that is part of me, that surrounds me and that is bigger than me. I like to most frequently refer to it as the Universe, but also it’s God or my inner guide.  It’s my trust in a source of something to have faith in, and often that is just you having a trust in your inner self, your energy and personal power.

Now, when we are blocked in some way, it’s usually because we are IN OUR OWN WAY! I resonate with this idea a lot, sometimes I swear I can see myself looming in front of me.

To allow ourselves to let things loosen a little we need to have a bit of an idea what we are giving it up to. Your faith is your unique thing and sometimes the coolest thing to have faith in is your own journey – we can all get behind that right?

I feel connected to my own feelings and totally trust the Universe has my back but can still struggle often to completely relinquish control.

The Ground Rules

Uncertainty is certain but right now in this tiny second there is no fear and everything is as it should be.

 Tweet: Uncertainty is certain but right now in this tiny second there is no fear and everything is as it should be - via

To accept flow we need to have an understanding of the present moment. If you’d like some tools to get grounded and present, check out this post!

 What has happened in the past no longer exists. The future, whilst abundant with plans is completely fluid. The only thing we can be sure of is the present moment.

If we are obsessive and controlling we grip onto our life so hard that we stop the natural flow, life is much harder and opportunities less apparent.


This is your challenge word, and our task is – to ‘let go’, we hear it and see it everywhere. We tell ourselves or people tell us a number of things such as – ‘Let go of things’, ‘Let go of control’, ‘Stop obsessing’, ‘Don’t think about that’ and so on.

It sounds so easy.. hey sure let’s just let go, woo, great! Wait WHAT!? but doesn’t the idea of ‘letting go of control’ associate with the opposite which would be being ‘out of control’? this sounds so negative to me, the idea of being out of control, like we have no power over our lives at all, or that we are making ‘crazy’ choices, woah ‘she’s so out of control!’

It’s not like that.

When I think of letting go, it is making a pact with my higher self that I will be open to being guided and take opportunities that are given to me, say yes more often, say no when I need to, be forgiving and forgive myself, it’s working WITH my life and to experience more happiness and less stress.


This is the word that you need, this is the word to replace control. This is the word that is infinitely better than ‘let go’.

I can tell you that ‘I Surrender’ is the most powerful mantra and thought process I have ever used. It is part of my daily practice. I have found an instant shift in many of my thought processes. I also teach this process to all my coaching clients and everyone gives it a resounding YES.

Why controlling thoughts stop us from moving forward

If we are in our own ‘flow’ and are listening to our intuition, life moves freely, we have less obstacles and our minds are clearer.

When we spend our time trying to control everything in our life it creates a blockage, we become static and removed from our journey and we blindfold our intuition .

Just writing that down rings so true to me, I can think of so many times in the past where I have put so much energy into trying to control aspects of my life and the outcomes have never been what I ‘wanted’ or the experience even been at all positive.

Some examples of how we use controlling thoughts  negatively in our lives –

  • In relationships – How many times have you been having a ‘conversation’ in your head (hello ego mind!) with your friend / partner / current crush / person you haven’t even met yet and you are constructing the situation, what you might say, what they might say back, what might be the outcome and so forth. This is a great example of trying to control relationships and can take up SO much time and energy. When and if this conversation actually happens it’s never as we ‘planned’ anyway, the time we have put into these thoughts was completely pointless
  • Within the ‘what if’ situations – I have written about the ‘what if’ concept before in my post about procrastination. It can also become a controlling thought pattern, we think about a situation, perhaps at work and we start to get anxieties about it and a million ‘what if’s’ suddenly appear and one by one we begin to try and form a type of control for the situation.
  • With our health – It’s a huge subject but the development of eating disorders can be largely down to control, because food is something we can control, it can’t talk back to us, we can always decide what we eat or don’t eat. Surrendering to my health and eating habits has been the most positive thing I have done in years and completely rid me of an eating disorder. I decided that instead of trying to control my weight I was going to instead CHOOSE my health. I used food as a thing to control when I felt like I was ‘out of control’ in other areas of my life and it only had negative consequences.
  • In Love – Spending time obsessing over people who aren’t currently in our lives, obsessing over past lovers, putting restrictions on our idea of love, all of these restrict our ability and flow to let love into our lives. We become blinded by our controlling thoughts and then are unable to see wonderful people and opportunities around us.

There are so many more examples, we are open to trying to inflict negative control patterns in ALL aspects of our lives. I’m sure you can think of ways in which you do it? We even use controlling thoughts to be negative about ourselves which restricts our confidence in achieving our dreams. 

So, why ‘Surrender’?

When I say ‘I surrender’ my intent is that I am surrendering my anxieties, ego thoughts, obsessions, problems up on a plate, I am surrendering TO allow things to move forward naturally and as they should. I am trusting that there is a flow to my life and that by surrendering my control over things I am making way for positive change and opportunities. I am stepping back into my present moment and not trying to force things into my life.

Surrendering frees me from the negative patterns that my ego mind creates.

Tweet: Surrendering frees me from the negative patterns that my ego mind creates - via @louniverse

From now on whenever you are in a wave of anxiety or stressful thinking, when you are planning a conversation three weeks in advance or beating yourself up about yesterday then just say it.


Even if for just one moment this pulls you back into the present and gives you the choice to choose to put your energy onto something more productive. As you practice it becomes more familiar and you need to use it less often because you are always surrendering!

A note on manifesting and visualisation – I have to mention visualising and manifesting here (a practice I fully believe in) The art of manifesting is that we decide what we want and we acknowledge it and then we release it (surrender!) into the Universe and into our energy, ALLOWING it to be. Manifesting is not deciding what we want, acknowledging it and then OBSESSING over it and trying to coerce it into being – See the difference?)

Have the intention

Take the Action


The practice of ‘Surrendering’  

I am currently using the word in two ways to help me and these are the ideas that I would love you to try.

  • As a simple mantra – I feel that a quick way to stop a negative or obsessive control pattern is to just simple say (aloud or in your thoughts) ‘I surrender’. By saying the words it is creating a simple shift in your thought pattern and allowing you to let go of the obsession and allow the situation to heal in it’s natural flow. I have been using this for the past week and it has completely changed my way of thinking.
  • As part of an affirmation about a situation – Staring the affirmation with ‘I surrender’ apply it to some of your challenges. Create an affirmation that rings true to you, and is purely positive. State the affirmation as if it is already true.Some affirmations using Surrender



Extend this mantra by forming your own positive sentences.

Shift by shift your thoughts calm down and oh there we go.. flow.

“I surrender this situation to flow as it should”

“Everything is perfect in this moment, I surrender.”

“I surrender my obsessive thoughts about X”

“I surrender my anxieties about relationships and allow love to come into my life”

“I surrender my fears and allow success into my endeavors”

“I surrender my day to the Universe”

“I surrender all negative thoughts about myself”

“I surrender to the flow of the Universe”

“I surrender to my fears and allow love to guide me”

“I surrender my resistance to move forwards”

“I surrender with confidence to my life’s path”

“To allow, I surrender”

“I surrender to sleep and am totally relaxed”

“I surrender my need for approval and I accept myself”

“I surrender to my creative flow”

The reason a surrender practice is so powerful is that you aren’t suddenly spinning out of control and giving up the wheel, instead you are loosening your grip and consequently allowing flow back into your life. This practice of course comes with a little sprinkling of faith but work on this with me.


  1.  Please find me on social media via the links below and let me know how your practice goes! – If you would like to come to one of my Surrender Workshops or have a Surrender session then let me know.
  2. Try my new Surrender Tarot spread here!
  3. PLUS: Sign up to my mailing list to be one of the first to receive news about my NEW online course SURRENDER FOREVER coming soon.



ENERGY – Part 1 – What is it? and How to protect your energy

This is part 1 of 5, please see the end of this post for links to read the next parts!


I have a lot of questions from people about energy protection and also notice myself offering advice to people because i notice when they are unknowingly taking on feelings and stresses from other people.

This piece is a basic introduction to thinking about yourself as an energetic being and I believe it is one of the keys to beginning to look after yourself in the way that you deserve.

I first started to really think about and consider my own energy as a physical and spiritual thing when I first moved to London about 12 years ago. Although I’d already for a few years been heading down towards my spiritual path I hadn’t really got to grips with my own space and how to look after myself.

What is energy?

“Mind – body – spirit. One part of this ‘spirit’ is your energy, it’s why your mood can change off the back of someone else’s without them even speaking and it’s why a building or space can feel strange or uplifting. Energy is what everything and every person is made of, it is invisible and it is contagious. Your energy field is around you, up to 6ft in a sphere. This space houses all your thoughts and feelings.”

If you think about everything being made of energy, you, the floor, the table, your book, your pets, the trees and so on, so we are all connected, we are all made from the same stuff, you are me, I am you. You ARE energy.

Following on from this, becoming familiar with your own energy means that you then will consciously become more aware of other peoples and the energy of your environment around you.
This in turn can help you find it easier to understand how to cope in situations and also notice when and how you need to think about protecting your own space.

How will I notice the effect of mine and others energies? 

A simple example of energy between people that I think everyone can relate to: Have you ever felt your mood change because of the mood of your friend, partner, mother, child – for instance you sit with someone crying and you become overwhelmingly sad or you are around someone who is clearly in a bad mood and suddenly you are feeling tetchy and irritable too. I think we have all experience this and that is as simple as the fact that you are picking up on their energy.

It’s the same way that you might notice yourself feeling tired and lethargic when you are around a friend who has a negative attitude or is constantly moaning, you will feel their energy.

You may notice that places have a similar effect on you. For instance some parts of hospitals may feel very draining, and if you consider the amount of unwell people in the building it makes sense.

That incredibly claustrophobic feeling that you can experience in the city at rush hour, or on public transport when it’s busy. If you imagine your field reaching out possibly in a 1-2 metre circle around you, then when you are next to others so close then they are IN your field and vice versa.

Maybe some places just don’t feel ‘right’ to you. Another example of you picking up on energies. In a psychic sense we may also feel energy from spirit, so places that are loaded with history e.g old Churches may to you feel different to a newer space. If we consider what may have happened in buildings in the past you can imagine the remnants of lives left behind.

Of course we will also be in places where we notice the energy being very uplifting and happy, or when we are surrounded by people with positive and inspiring attitudes.

It’s really important to be aware of your own energy field and your own thoughts in order to protect yourself from collecting every mood and feeling around you that is not your own. You can’t be at your best is you’re not totally whole.

So where do we go from that? 

I think it’s safe to say that ideally we would all like to be in control of our own thoughts, feelings and emotions. The last thing we want is to also be carrying the feelings from all those around us whether they be family or strangers in the street.

I also feel that we are unable to help someone in need if we are taking on their troubles. If your partner is upset the last thing you want is to be upset too. This is different to feeling sympathetic and empathetic which of course you still feel, but you don’t want to take on their energy. What you need is your own strengths and reserves to be able to help people.

This is a good example for people who are therapists, carers, doctors etc. If you took on the energy of every client that walked through your door then you are likely to feel very tired, confused and ungrounded at the end of the day.

How do I protect my energy?

One of the most powerful abilities we have is to visualise. Visualisation is so effective for protecting our energy, clearing our space and of course manifesting the life that we wish to have.

I will talk about other exercises for clearing yourself when you already feel sluggish and for manifesting in other posts but for now here are some ways to protect your own energy via visualisation methods.

If you think you’d benefit from keeping your space to yourself as it were then please try these, even if it sounds like a strange idea it will help. Echoing what I started this piece with, when I first moved to London I found it hugely overwhelming, I felt sick and claustrophobic the whole time and never quite all there. I researched into psychic protection and energy protective methods and started trying them out. I now see this visualisation as part of my every day routine, one moment to ‘see’ something and it’s there for your day.


The exercise / your new positive habit!

Visualise (‘see’) something protective around yourself, whatever is the most natural for you to envisage.

I personally see myself surrounded in a protective bubble or a bright white / golden light. Other suggestions could be an egg or a coat of armour, or see yourself wrapped up in a thick velvet floor length cloak.

Get into the habit of always having it there. Wake up, get dressed etc, then visualise your protection, this will keep your energy with you and stop everyone else’s sticking to you.

Remember that your energy is like a bright shining light open to being stuck to by dust and dirt from all around you. Once you have visualised it, then it’s there, but do it every day and reinforce if you are in a crowded space or maybe even somewhere you feel less safe or where you know the energy might be quite strong – eg a doctors surgery.

If it sounds silly then try it anyway, because it works, tried and tested for years, I’m VERY aware when i haven’t protected myself. What you visualize IS real.

Another visualisation that’s good for when you’re around other people who are maybe sad, upset, angry, is to see a mirror between you and them and this keeps their energy in their own space. As I said before I think it’s impossible to help someone (which is the goal right?) if being with them just makes you sad too.

NEW Energy Awareness Workshop!

This is such an important and enjoyable subject for me to speak about and I have now started running a 90 minute workshop. The workshop can be taken as part of a group or one on one.


PLEASE NOTE! – This article is part of a series:

Part 1 – How to protect your energy
Part 2 – How to clean and clear your energy
Part 3 – How to ground your energy
Part 4 – Our lives online and a scattering of self
Part 5 – The energy of your words and the importance of a gratitude practice
Part 6 – How to look after your energy while travelling

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