Procrastination & ‘What ifs’ – How to start to move forward.
I read recently that procrastination is merely a form of avoidance & fear.
I believe (and have experienced) this to be a perfect description.
So how do we find a solution to our procrastinating, how do we break the bad habit of avoiding doing what we should be doing?
It’s all about the FIRST step, the hardest one to take. Sometimes I find myself avoiding things and knowing it’s just because I am afraid to make the move. Or sometimes avoidance comes because we don’t want to face a sad, scary or awkward situation.
But, where does this get us? nowhere, in fact it leads us to doubt ourselves more, prevents us from moving on and it leads us to actually let in the fear and the ego and being to believe that we aren’t capable of things.
We start to make negative comments like ‘I can’t do that’.
Which is worse, ‘failing’ or doing nothing at all? I think we all know the answer. Choosing to be afraid of failing or just choosing to be afraid of a situation isn’t moving forward, it’s stepping backwards into our comfort zone believing that we are better without the worry of the ‘what if?’
The ‘what if?’
When I was younger I really fell prisoner to the ‘what if’ feeling, so many things I thought or wanted to do came with this tag and often led me to become static and also unhappy. I often stayed within my comfort zone and also was very afraid of a lot of things. I only really pulled out of this because of a life experience that changed the way I looked on things and also my concept of fear itself.
Now when I feel like I could be worrying about a situation I think it’s important to switch around the thoughts and turn the ‘what if’ into a positive:
What if everything works out great? / What if he/she’s the love of my life? / What if it’s a huge success? / What if I have a good time? / What if it helps me? / What if i end up happy?
It’s only really a simple case of glass half full or half empty and if what you do doesn’t go to how you planned it then you have the joy of your effort. When you’re dealing with a difficult or painful situation then you can be glad that you HAVE dealt with it, you didn’t hide or run away, and now you can go forward.
I used to be really afraid of flying. ‘What if the plane crashes?’ to other things like ‘what if I get sick in flight?’ and when you have these thoughts then no amount of logic helps you turn from the feeling of fear.
When I started flying again (after six years!) the thing that actually pushed me to be able to do it was visualising how proud I would be of myself when I’d arrived at my destination, to be able to message my family and send that ‘landed’ text that we always send each other.
It was seeing myself within in the positive result (a good example of positive visualisation) happy that I’d taken that step to get through a fear and proving that love was way stronger than the fear itself.
First step = Movement.
I believe that if you can take that one step forward then the Universe will take three more for you, you will get a nudge when you’re moving in the right direction. This has been proven to me time and time again.
Be willing to let go of control and to embrace FLOW.
Don’t be scared of: The unknown, of starting new projects, of finishing old ones, of saying hello, of saying goodbye, of letting go of the past, of letting go of illnesses or friendships, of making new connections, of saying sorry, of working hard, of taking a break, of forgiving someone,
of saying YES.